I have some birthday money left that is literally burning a hole in my pants. Every year I am given money for my birthday and every year I vow to get myself one big item or a few small things to remind me of my birthday. And, every year, I fail in my quest. The money goes into my wallet and before long I have spent it on sundry stuff with nothing to show for.

Not this year. The plan is to buy a mobile phone to replace my rather worn looking device. Despite a protective film, it has two cracks from abuse and a camera function that is a little suspect. I did some homework, and have decided to buy one that is on offer by my service provider. The deal is I pay a little less than the market price in exchange for contractually agreeing to use its service for an agreed number of months. I get a discount and the company gets my loyalty. Fair trade.

I do not want the latest or the highest-end model in the market. Apart from costing as much as or more than some people’s monthly salary or even a good laptop, which would do a lot more for me, the features highlighted are not what I really want or would use. Agreed, newer and innovative features tend to require more spend on research and development. It was reported that Samsung invested US$12.7 billion in 2017 on research and development and Apple US$10 billion[1].

My mobile phone wish list is simple. Sure, it’s nice to have a very sturdy, big screen, super slim mobile phone with huge processing power, multi-camera and multi-everything in place. But all I want and will very likely use is a phone that allows me to make and receive calls, send texts and snap reasonably clear photos for my own keepsake and my blog. Enhancements in streaming movies, videos and music, playing mobile games and capturing perfect selfies don’t interest me.

Firstly, I watch movies on a LG OLED 55-inch TV because everything is clearer and magnified and I can actually see what I am watching. I have difficulty making out words, faces and movements on a tiny mobile screen that has the habit of swivelling from vertical to horizontal and visa-versa at the slightest touch. A tad disconcerting. Secondly, I only occasionally stream a song or two. Certainly not enough to have a play list or a Spotify account. I know it shows my age but I just don’t do these things.

Thirdly, I have never played online or mobile games although I appreciate the benefits it offers particularly in terms of problem-solving and coordination. My husband bought himself a new iPad because his favourite game hung too often. He plays Civilization most evenings after work whilst watching TV (he multitasks). I prefer arcade games like hoop basketball, table foosball and bowling.

Fourthly, I don’t enjoy having my photo taken at the best of times. Selfies, I like even less. When I am forced to do a selfie, the end product looks really bad. As the selfie taker and the closest to the telephone, my face always looks too big and rather frightening. The blame lies squarely on my shoulders as I have no talent nor inclination for selfies. But selfies are a huge craze especially amongst the millennials. As an aside, the average millennial is expected to take 25,700 selfies during his or her lifetime. Millennials contribute 55 percent of social media selfies, followed by Gen X at 24 percent and baby boomers at 9 percent[2]. Hence, it’s no surprise that there are continuous improvements in camera phone technology.

I am not entirely sure that the phone I have identified will do the trick. I say this only because many years ago, I bought the Samsung Galaxy Note 3 specifically so that I could do my work, which involved a lot of writing, wherever I was. Nope. It didn’t happen. For some reason, I just couldn’t write with the stylus pen.

Now, I use the keypad on my low-end, cracked in two places mobile phone, to write when I am watching TV, waiting in a queue or travelling on a train, sans a book to read ( I also multitask). I write the stories in my email, and send them to my laptop. I have copies of my stories that I call up to edit, wherever and whenever. It works for me, and fortunately too, because my plan to upgrade is temporarily on hold. The phone I want is out of stock. Nothing to show for again? Maybe, maybe not.