Last week I wrote about losing my jolly. I’d identified the jolly stealers in writing in the hope of not thinking and giving them more brain space than I already have, and do. All in the hope of getting back my jolly.

While I sort of knew somethings that could help, I still searched on Google. Predictably, there was/is an abundance of information and advice on activities, habits and attitudes related to finding happiness/solace/balance, self-improvement, introspection, and acceptance. There were/are plenty of reasonable suggestions and anecdotal examples that could help address/shake-off difficult/bad/sad situations/people. And, possibly assist in achieving a happier and a more balanced sense of well-being.

I actually like and agree with many of the proposed solutions and/or shared perk-me-ups. For instance, eating right. For meals, choose complex carbohydrates like whole grains and vegetables that release the ‘feel-good’ hormone, serotonin. I know I should but I get sidetracked into eating fats, the bad kind found in cakes, chocolates, and ice-cream.

Sleeping more. I don’t/can’t sleep enough. I know chronic sleep deprivation/deficit affects mood, and impairs memory and concentration. It also disrupts metabolism and increases stress hormones. Nephew number 2 suggested seeing/being out in the sun for at least 10 minutes each morning. I’m trying it out. I’ve also stopped drawing the curtains to shut the sun out.

Meditating. My mind is a wanderer. It’s curious how my mind, once instructed to not think, quite instantly meanders, hops, and jumps from topic to topic, unrelated, irrelevant, and nonsensical.

Exercising. This I do regularly. Yay ! Apparently even 10 minutes is enough to release endorphins, the pain and stress-relieving hormones. Plus serotonin and dopamine, the duo of happy hormones. I hope exercise might win me some points against eating badly and running a sleep deficit.

Smiling. I am a smiler. It comes naturally to me.

Giving compliments.  I am an enthusiastic dispenser of praise and acknowledgement, when warranted.

Practising gratitude. Oh yes, I do every day, particularly in the morning when I wake up, and when I go to bed at night, and hope to sleep.  

Keeping a journal. I keep a daily record of places visited, and things done while on holidays but not when I’m at home. The routine is not an incentive, although I still write things-to-do/done on my desk calendar. More as a reminder to myself.

Avoiding comparisons with others. I was never into this, thankfully. No envying or copying friends and/or family.

Letting go of grudges/misunderstandings. More difficult than I imagined. I think it’s the sense of being wronged that’s hard to accept and let go. Also, without honest discussion and closure, the embers of unresolved feelings/emotions linger.

Self-care. I’m lagging behind on this. I should shift the focus a little more on me, myself, and I.

Being one with nature or just outdoors. My husband and I try to go for walks, and get away from the city as often as we can.

Decluttering. I have begun the process of downsizing and giving away things that I don’t use/wear.  

My favourite three are as follows. Create a list of happy memories. I have started with a few memories, and will share them with the co-conspirators of my many happy moments/events. One such silly but happy memory was when my husband and I had a bellyaching laugh in the middle of the night, in pitch black darkness, after we realised we had walked in the wrong direction into the woods instead of the communal bathroom at a campervan park.  

Plan a trip or a holiday. This definitely works. Back in 2012, my husband and I took a year off to travel. We were on a high most of 2011. We spent many excited days and months talking, discussing, and planning the holidays. Countries, flights, distances, routes between places, car hires, food and, language. Of course, it involved a lot of work, planning and bookings etc, which my husband took on but it was a lot of fun. And we have re-lived the holiday/s, years after we returned, and even now.

Acknowledge and react to unhappy moments/situations and stresses in life. Because I was/am caught up in my own little swirling world of day-to-day responsibilities, I forgot/forget that bad things – accidents, deaths, mistakes, toxic people, work stress and natural disasters happen to all of us. What is important is how we choose to acknowledge/recognise and react to them. I kid you not. Reaction is the first word that pops in my head when a situation arises. These days, I do my best to accept and let go what I can’t control. What, where and when I can, I think and react as sensibly, practically and justly as possible. No negatives. No arguments.

Have I found my jolly? Yes, a little. Its coming back, slowly but surely. With constant reminders, and reinforcements.